A Quiet Heart

This is a post from last March. It seems like a good re-share!

I haven't been able to hear my heart so I haven't been able to get out what I needed to.

This is one of those things that happens to everyone from time to time. It is not always easy to remember to get centered in the heart living in such a busy and fast paced world. And sometimes we can't hear out heart because our brains are simply talking too loud.

When I needed help returning to heart help came in the form of a friend who told me that I inspire her and brighten up her life just by being in it. The full body tingle I felt on hearing that was the wake up call I needed, a reminder that my purpose is deeper and greater than I have ever imagined.

The Heart of the Matter

Sometimes we need reminders of what drives us forward, of what dreams we have forgotten to long for and the influence we may have on other people. Knowing that I touch peoples live simply by existing is pretty powerful. It is powerful in a way that means I am moving in the right direction, even though it might feel a little unnerving.....a little scary even!

Listening to the heart doesn't always feel like you imagine: there may not be the pounding thrill of rushing blood, it may be quiet so you may have really open to hear it. A heart reaching out may only be able to whisper.

Are you listening to your heart? What do you hear?

How To: Be Free of Flakes

Bet you thought this was going to be a post on dandruff, huh? Well, it is and it isn't. You see if you have flakes in your life it is because you haven't taken the proper amount of care to rid yourself of them. When flakes are on your head you need to use a medicated shampoo, get a good clarifier and really work that scalp.

When you have flakes in your life you have to use a medicated....oh wait. So how does one remove flakes from life?

Stop putting up with it. If there are people in your world who don't make you feel better, smarter, elevated, loved, inspired, strong, trusted, well liked and confident at least 90% of the time, get rid of them. Yeah, I said it, get rid of them. 10% off is all you are willing to give to this behavior and even that number is too high! Don't call them. Don't make plans with them. Take them out of your FB news feed. I don't mean you have to get nasty and start calling people names. But you might want to own that if these flakes have been around for a while it is because they have repeatedly been allowed to behave in a certain manner.

Don't think you are being held hostage by other people. You are being held hostage by you.

Only you really know what is acceptable in your life and what is not. And thus only you can create and set boundaries. There might even be people in your life who think you're the flake! Something to consider. Scary, isn't it?

It isn't as hard as you think to create room for new people, new situations but it can be hard to adjust with the old ones. We cannot change other people, we can only change ourselves.

If there are a lot of people in your life that you can never rely yet who always rely on you, the balance of power is clear and you have none of it. If there are people in your life who think they can break plans all the time at the last minute and you continue to make plans with them, well my dear, that is really on you.

Becoming clear on what you want in your life will be much more effective than focusing on what you don't. Control your experience by actively participating in it. Clear out flaky friends the same way you would clear out your refrigerator or the kitchen cabinets: one shelf at a time.

Are you surrounded by people who don't respect your standards and boundaries? Why? What purpose do you feel they serve in your life that allows that disregard to remain?

Afternoon Tea

Photo and words (C) S.M. Raven 2011

Chi- a poem

words and photo (c) S.M Raven 2001/2011

Housing the Sole

one of my contributions from 30 days of creativity June 2011

I think a lot about my feet. We stand on them and they hold us up for hours at a time. They allow us to walk, sometimes miles, before we allow them to rest. We don't take care of them the way we should, though, honoring the gift that they bestow upon us. I personally am grateful everyday for having feet that take me where I want to go on my nicely working stems.

My sister takes poor care of her feet. I discovered last year that apparently when our dad was handing out advice on taking care of the feet, he only was talking to me, the daughter with the sudden random growth spurt and long feet. I walk everywhere, so keep my nails trimmed, try to always wear good shoes and if I need to, soak them in salt & bubble bath.

Being kind to the limbs at the end of your legs is important. When I see a person who is no longer easily mobile, I think about how much I would miss that and then I go for a long walk in the sunshine because I can and what a blessing that is! Do what the picture says, and all will be just fine.

Want to treat your feet?

Plan to do nothing for 10 to 20 minutes. Put down a towel. Get something you can easily put both of your feet in and add some warm water. I like it slightly hot so it doesn't cool down too fast. Toss in a handful of Epsom salt. When I run out, I use sea salt, which still has some nice texture to it. Add some of your favorite scent bubble bath or soap and as an extra, add a bit of oil (I like coconut) to help soften. Grab a second towel and a book, sit down, soak your feet. Relax! Enjoy this peaceful moment.

Where do You Want to Go?

I know where I'm going.

I even see how it's beginning to happen as it takes shape. But I'm not ready to get there yet.

'Serenity' photo (C) Seletta M Raven

Well, that isn't really true. I am more ready than ever before. I am actively working towards it. Some days it feels as though no progress has been made in any direction, though that is far from true. Where I want and need to go doesn't look to me anything like it does to anyone else. I am finally comfortable with letting the flow happen. Because fighting the current only causes more trouble!

My ultimate goal is to have my needs met and my wants exceeded.

Where are you wanting to go that you are not quite ready for? Is it different from the expectations of those around you? Where do you want to go and how can your community help you get there?

A Surprising Anniversary

I can hardly believe it is already November! Since it is though I need to start it off right. This is a month to be thankful and today I am thankful for the love that I am surrounded by daily. In fact, I have been surrounded by the love above for a whopping 12 years. Sascha has been with me through my sickly mid twenties, culinary school, the death of soul mother, the loss of my family home, the death of my brother, and the last two years while I effed making art, he held the fort down and made sure we had a roof and food.

Today I am thankful that we made it through good times and bad, that we have a dog we love, a safe place to live and that we really do still love each other. Actually more than we did at the beginning. Happy Anniversary my love! Now, I'm off for a cuppa!

What are you grateful for today? Happy November 1st!

Raspberry Cupcakes

Baking is one of those things I feel I need to do when I feel really mislaigned. The process of creating something from scratch always feels so magical and important to me that I love the whole process. Before you think of how scary it is to bake with the weights and measures, it's really a thing you should relax about. The oven can always tell when you panic! We can still get raspberries here in California but I did originally make these June as I do try to utilize what is fresh and in season. But with Fall not yet raising her pretty head it is really hard to know what season it is right now!

Raspberry Cupcakes

1/2 cup soft unsalted butter
2/3 cup brown sugar
1 cup flour + 1/2 cup oat flour
1 1/2 teaspoons baking powder
1/2 teaspoon salt
1 c half and half
2 eggs
1/4 cup fresh raspberries
12 dark chocolate discs

 preheat oven to 350 F. Line muffin tin.


 Whisk together the dry ingredients and set aside. Beat the butter, sugar, milk and eggs on low until pale and fluffy. Add your dry ingrediants and combine until just mixed. Divide evenly among the muffin cups, place a chocolate disk in sideways and bake for about 15 minutes, or until a skewer comes out clean.

I like to do a basic vanilla frosting with this, butter, powdered sugar plus a splash of milk and vanilla. Enjoy!

Bacon, Leek and Potato Tart

I don't know about your house, but I live with a meat and potatoes kind of man, so sometimes I have to get inventive if I want him to eat outside of the proverbial box. This idea came when I realized that putting something tasty with bacon in pastry was a sure fire way to get him to enjoy something I really wanted. He still has no idea what all the ingredients are. It's best if we just don't tell him.

For the Tart you will need:

1 uncooked pie crust:

1 1/4 cup flour

3/4 stick cold butter, cubed

1/4 tsp salt

5 tbsp cold water

Combine salt and flour. You can use a food processor or mixer for this. Add butter and mix until it looks like a mealy dough. Add water 1 tbsp at a time until it makes a cohesive dough. Have extra cold water ready just in case your dough is a bit dry.

Pat into a round, wrap and chill for at least one hour.

preheat your oven to 350 F. and prep the rest of your ingredients.

For the filling you will need:

6 slices bacon, cooked crisp

4 potatoes, sliced thin and par cooked

1 large leek, cleaned sliced thin and lightly sauteed

The easiest thing to do is utilize your bacon fat here and cook the potatoes and leeks in it as well!

Use paper towels or tempura paper to drain the fat and set aside.

Once you have everything together, roll out your dough and place it in a tart tin. You don't want it too thick, or it won't be very crispy. Prick the bottom of the dough, pop into the oven for 7 to 10 minutes or until turning a light golden brown. Add your potatoes, leeks and bacon to the tart crust and then pour over 3 tsp cream + 1 egg (2 if you really like eggs), lightly beaten with a fork.

Bake about 20, then turn off your oven and allow to cool.

This is perfect for a light supper with some arugula and mushrooms, or even with a lovely little french onion soup!

Be Mindful of What You Send Out

Molasses Cookies

Imagine a day where you need something warm and delicious to go with brown sugar ice cream. So you whip up a simple, delicious batch of cookies, the kind that once rolled in a little brown sugar have a marvelous crispy texture and are perfect for a sandwich cookie.Yeah, I thought that might get your attention.

Molasses Cookies

1/2 c shortening
1 c brown sugar + 1/2 c set aside
1/2 c molasses
1 egg
2 c whole wheat pastry flour
1 tsp ground ginger
1 tsp ground cardamom
1/2 tsp cloves (optional)
1/2 tsp salt

preheat oven to 350 F.

Whisk together dry ingredients and set aside.

Beat sugar, egg, molasses and shortening until light and fluffy.

Beat in dry ingredients until well combined.

Use a tea spoon or a small cookie scoop and drop into the brown sugar that was set aside. Roll, press down and bake for about 10 min.

These are also easy to freeze! Don't roll in sugar until you are ready to bake. Freeze on a piece of parchment in a flat area of your freezer, then wrap in plastic wrap or freezer safe bags.

Reciprocity

The call in the world right now is do good, help others and everything else will fall in line. There are certainly some though, who might attest that it is not always quite so simple. I say things may be lining up, though very different from how you envisioned. This might be the perfect time to step back and assess.

So, what good have you gained from the good you have put out into the world? Has it taken a form that made it almost unrecognizable as reciprocity? I have found that much of what I do for others is paid back in kind from completely different quarters. Today might be a good day to really sit down and count your blessings.

You will be surprised at the bounty of goodness you have received when you weren't even looking.

What abundance have you reaped that might have come from good you did for someone else? Share it in the comments, because celebrating abundance always brings more!

I Move in Joyous Abundance

the art in my office

What makes you feel joyful and abundant?

How can you create more of that?

Apricot Lavender Shortbread

I know that there are a great many people who don't care for lavender in their food and insist that it takes like soap. I have two things to say to that: 'Okay, then you don't have to eat it' and 'If it tastes like soap, you've done something terribly wrong.'

When I worked at the winery years ago I got used to wandering out in the garden and taking roses, borage, lavender, lemon verbena and rosemary back into my kitchen. The amount of dreamy things you can create from fresh herbs is beyond measure and I for one am looking forward to the day when we are back in a spot where Sascha can have a garden.

This recipe is from my pastry chef days, and I promise you, it is really good. The trick is, as always, to use high quality ingredients and have patience. Baked goods cannot be rushed and they will know if you get desperate.  For me, the golden rule is to relax into what you are doing, whether that be baking or cooking. Believe me, it makes all the difference in the world.

Apricot Lavender Shortbread

1 c walnut oil

2 c pastry flour

½ c lavender sugar (use 1 tsp of lavender for your 1/2 c of sugar)

½ tsp salt

1½ c dried apricots, chopped and re-hydrated

preheat oven to 325 F.

Combine all ingredients until well mixed, pat into in lightly oiled pan and bake for 20 minutes. Allow to cool, cut and enjoy!

Vintage African American Photos

I have been working on art a lot lately, drawing, painting, stretching myself to grow outside my little art box and into the proverbial sun. Always on the look out for inspiration I Googled to find some goodies. Searching the Internet I found so really great stuff that made me want to share it!

Gentleman smoking

 

 

 

Four Ladies in Hats

Lovely woman

Here is a whole set of great vintage ladies!

Lipstick Alley has a great thread on African American vintage photos.

Also Vintage Black Glamour has a fabulous collection that is not to be missed!

Failure Is Not Your Only Option

I watch you set yourself upon for rejection. I wonder when you are going to stop doing that.

It is perfectly okay to choose, right now, in this moment, to love yourself.

So go ahead, accept that lovely compliment. Expect that people want to hang out with you.

Acknowledge that the past is done and this, my friend, is a whole new era of awesome.

Start now.

Speak Your Truth

Yesterday I left a message on FB about something that had been bothering me for a while.

I had been ignoring it because I used to often be accused of being a whiner, a complainer, a trouble maker. But I could feel myself rebelling at keeping quiet. I have been very outspoken when it comes to suicide and yesterday I talked about  how when people make flippant comments that are thoughtless it seriously bugs me.

What made me feel better was that instead of anyone coming back to tell me I was being oversensitive, my friends were greatly supportive and agreed with me. It made me realize that if I speak up it creates space for someone else to the same. And if you speak up, it helps create space for the rest of us.

This is the reason that I talk about this subject so passionately: at 19, my brother felt so bad about his life, so hopeless that he chose to hang himself. So to me, joking that you'll kill yourself if you don't get fancy shoes, art supplies or some pretty frill makes me queasy.

And keeping silent makes me even more so.

My question for you is, what are you keeping silent about that would make you feel better if you talked about? And what assumption are you making about how those around you will respond? Tell me in the comments!

Lemon and Ricotta Ziti

 When I made this, I honestly felt that it really needed more lemon, but I am a lemon freak. Taste the ricotta and lemon before adding it to the pasta, that way you can adjust as you need to it. What I love about this dish it that it is quick and that you could easily add a little more or vegetables for something that is nutritious and palate pleasing.

For four servings, you will need:

Coarse salt
1 lb ziti
1 lb ricotta
3 tbsp butter
Freshly grated pepper
Zest and juice of 2 lemons
Fresh chopped herbs (I like thyme or rosemary, but its up to you)

Boil water and salt it. Cook pasta until al dente.

Stir lemon zest, juice and herbs into ricotta. Save 1 cup of pasta water before draining.

 Return pasta to pot, stir in butter and then add ricotta. Season to taste with pepper. If you need to thin the cheese out, add some of your pasta water.

Add a salad and you have dinner in no time!

Independently Happy

Last year, I had someone tell me that it seemed like I craved the drama of my old life because I miss certain people. At the time, I thought that she could possibly be right.

Upon further reflection though, it is quite easy for someone who has had an easy life to make that sort of assumption.

Much has happened in my life and since I am only a third of the way through it, it seems daunting to people that I have seen so much pain and come out on the other side still happy.

I'm here to tell you this: Unhappiness is severely overrated.

Moving into a space where I don't dwell on my mistakes has allowed me to see my true worth. Sure I have bad days, everybody does.  

But we never have to be whatever someone else tells us we are.

I am vulnerable. I am ready to live my best. And just because I miss people from my past doesn't mean I crave drama. It just means I can look back with clear eyes.

Coming Clean

I spent most of the week hunting down a check and trying to figure out how not to take a job I didn't want.

I am seriously hoping that the check issue will get worked out today and I was saved from the bad job by a good job. The reason I am telling you all this is because this week, I had some serious trouble avoiding the voices in my head. The ones that kept telling me I needed a job asap in spite of the fact that if you want to be  technical, I currently have three.

Or the voice that reminded me that 19 days from today I will be 37 and have nothing to show for it.

And then I made a shift.

Because I really do have three jobs. Sure they are just beginning, mostly on call right now, but I have them! I also have some really amazing people in my world who rallied around me the other day when I most needed people to do just that. When breaking it all down, I am not only lucky I am downright blessed.

'Bubbles' (C)2012 S.M. Raven

Last week I lost my glasses, oh the crisis, oh the angst! And again, two of my friends offered to pay for news and another offered me one of her extra pairs. This doesn't really sound like I am living a life of lack, though yes, there are many times when I feel that way.

There is nothing wrong with days when you are feeling low. Just don't let them drag you down to the bottom of the depths. Allow yourself to see and be buoyed by all the love that comes to you, which sometimes isn't actively acknowledged.

What shift do you need to make right now to make the rest of this week better for you?