Ginger Apricot Mini Cakes

One of my conundrums is that I often want to bake but I don't always know what to make. These refreshing little cakes were inspired by the need to bake using only the available ingredients in the house and were a rewarding experiment. 

Preheat oven to 400 F, line or butter a 12 cup pan.

1 stick butter, soft
1 c chopped dried apricots, soaked & drained
1/4 chopped fresh ginger + 2 tbsp chopped candied ginger
3/4 c vanilla sugar
3/4 c milk (I like coconut for it's thickness)
2 eggs
2 c flour
3 tsp baking powder

Sift flour and baking powder, coat ginger and apricots, then set aside.

Combine butter, sugar, eggs and milk.

Now, when you combine the wet and dry mixes, you want to make sure not to over mix. It should be a bit lumpy. Pour into lined, prepared cupcake tins. Sprinkle the tops with sugar so they will be crunchy! Bake for about 20 minutes.

Re-Curating Your Life

I have shared before that I come from a long line of pack-rats. It is far too easy to ignore the piles of stuff from discarded hobbies, previous jobs, school and just general life. Somewhere in the midst of all that though, lies some other things. Your past. Some of your sense of self-worth. The secrets to your future.

Last week I decided to start cleaning as though I was moving. Turns out that was prophecy on my part. I know when I have to move by, but not where to or how that is going to happen. This is the scary stuff that is hard to face because getting complacent means we never have to. I'm not proud of it, but I did get complacent.

The last six months have been hard. Harder than any time we have had before. The money struggles have meant giving up things like hanging with friends and little luxuries. It has been stressful. It has finally taken its toll, meaning that after nearly 13 years, I find my self becoming single. There is a lot of sadness for both of us around because it isn't a lack of love that is causing the break. I have a lot of 'stuff' to sort through, mental, physical and emotional. Please bear with me during this technical difficulty. Please keep your hands inside the car and refrain from bad mouthing the man I am parting from. It isn't that kind of ride. Because we can honestly say that we still love each other.

One thing I can certainly admit is that I am not who or where I want to be and lack a clear vision of what that looks like. It would seem that he is feeling much. We've been at energetic odds for a while. There is another lesson in there; we humans tend to spend time fighting about things that don't matter and avoid talking about the things that do.

This is something I cut out of a magazine and pasted into my journal last week. It's all that is on the page. It is likely all that will be on the page. I send myself messages like a channeller, perhaps because that is the only way for me to hear them. I'm terrified of leaping yet once again I have no choice. This is a huge push of forward motion that I may be stumbling through but have to make it one way or the other. It is unbelievably sad and hard and yet it clearly needs to happen. This isn't shaky ground we're on any more.

My friend Jennifer, made a comment on one of my posts that she is 're-curating' her life. How powerful is that? I can stop battling and start re-curating. I can clean out, clean up, set free, let go, move in the right direction. It is not as if I am totally alone, although the loss of someone you love, still love, even if you cannot be with them leaves you feeling lonely and lost and sad.

Once the tears stop and the smoke clears, the best I can hope for is to land on my feet and not on my ass. I will take with me into the future the knowledge that love isn't always enough. Giving more of yourself or giving things up doesn't always work out in your favor. I will take with me the knowledge that I need to pay more attention to the signs at the side of the road that say 'stop here', 'speed limit 45 so you don't miss a thing' or 'now is a good time to stop the fight'. I will remember that being a little selfish is okay and some things aren't worth fighting over. Because battling your life is never a really good option.

Spicy Shrimp Soup

There's a magic that happens when you have good ingredients and plenty of time to create something rich in flavor and love. One of my old roommates used to make a soup of shrimp, peppers and potatoes. She always used fake butter to cook everything with before putting it all in a pot.

Not my style. The goal for me is always to layer the flavor, to build something from the bottom up that leaves you happy to the last bite. My version of the recipe is fairly simply yet with patience will leave you richly rewarded. Besides, fake butter is bad.

for two people as dinner. For four people, add in a salad.

1/2 a yellow onion, chopped
1/2 a red pepper, chopped
garlic, chopped (you can use as much or as little as you like)
1 large potato, chopped
1/2 large can of diced tomato
8 Oz shrimp
1 lime, sliced in quarters
salt, pepper, sriracha

Prep your mise-en-place. Once you start, you won't want to stop to chop something!

Saute the onion with a little coconut oil. Once the onion is soft and translucent, add the pepper, let soften a bit. Add in your garlic, let cook until garlic gives off scent. Put in your potato, cover with half can of tomatoes and water to fill the pot.

Simmer to cook the potatoes. Season with salt, pepper and sriracha to taste. If you use more than a few drops it can really spicy, so taste it before adding more! Drop in the shrimp just before serving so it doesn't over cook. Serve with good corn chips and a lime wedge or two for added flavor.

Word of the Month for May: Focus

The other day while gazing at last month's new moon board I had a realization: most of that happened.

It feels like things are coming together a little easier. More engagement has been had! I went to this super magical art class. I wrote. I was more active within my online communities. There were some bad days. But all in all? April went pretty well.

So clearly, doing a new board was essential!

New moon? Eclipse? Not movies, baby, but the timing for a new board, new shifting, more magic.....

Messages from the Canvas

*

Isolation is a Dreamkiller. Barbara Sher

                                                                                                                                                   

The Motherload

 I have purple paint under my fingernail. In my mind, I'm still dancing with glitter paint and painting flowers. Paint, paint, paint. I sit at home doing my artwork and wondering, who will like this, who will connect to this, who will care? I suspect that it is the same for many artists.

The choice to go check out an intuitive art class wasn't a conscious one. That was a soul choice, rising up from within, clamoring for something deeper. I was nervous. So used to feeling out of sync with the dynamic in a room. Awkward. The warmth of my welcome was not lost on me. Hmmmm...... I was hugged, I was greeted kindly, I was listened to.

This isn't an art class on a typical level. You aren't there to learn how to draw or paint better. The purpose is get into the work and listen to your inner guide. It is so easy to forget that there is so much wisdom within us. Our inner guides, our intuition has so much to say.

Painting in a quiet room filled with other people is liberating. Knowing that there is someone there to help if you need creates a sense of peace that is needed when getting deep into the process. Which I did. These shifting waves that began in March are still tumbling over me. Still opening me.

And then came a message from the canvas. While I am ready to create more space, this is not a practice I have much experience in. Clearly my subconscious is letting me know that it is time to create something new. It is both exciting and terrifying.

My takeaway from Chris Zydel's Intuitive Art class? That out of syncness doesn't have to exist. This is not a competition. The only person I need to get really vulnerable with in that room is myself. And that is possibly the greatest challenge of all.

Turtlenecks and naps

Last week I once again fell down on the job when it came to self care. Stress levels have been high and self love quite a bit low. My big takeaway from the week is that it is essential to have something to look forward to like my upcoming trip but also my weekly tea date with one of my good friends.

And I did quite a bit of art, too, which helped. I even took the time to do a blank space page in my vision book. During Spirits of Joy I remembered how much I love the whole cutting, pasting, dreaming aspect of vision journals and having prompts was perfect to keep me on track. Some of us need little rituals to help us do the things we know we need to for ourselves. Which is fine as long as we remember to create them.

This week I also wrote my first mini course, which needs to be edited and run through my proofreader before I kick it out for beta. !!!!

 I have no idea what I did here....and I really wish I did. The more I look at her the more love is felt. She is something really special. And out of the ordinary for me!

This week, make sure you take a time out to rest, relax and replenish. Your body will thank you for it!

Giveaway Winner...and the Danger of Thinking for Others

I've been feeling kind of emo this week.Only two people entered my giveaway, leaving me to believe that only two people liked my photo enough to want to have a copy of it. Which hurts. You see, I'm pretty damn proud of being published again. I never mean to take a hiatus but coming back from one is not always easy. It requires shifting and being open to change. And making the cover was like someone had handed me the perfect slice of cake and then handed me an even better one.

I love photography and always have. Getting a shot that was well received was worth celebrating! I decided to do a giveaway when I was accepted because that photo almost never happened. I almost walked away from it. The fact that it made it into the magazine was a good reminder; sometimes our higher self is speaking to an unrevealed purpose and a photo isn't just a photo.

It was delightful to wake up to a dear friend who posted on FB and commented on the blog. Her response was so moving and elated it nearly made my heart burst. And then....nothing. I could see that people were reading the post. What I couldn't see was if anyone was buying the magazine or who did. Because I am in the magazine and not the creator or editor. I mentioned to one of my closest friends that it seemed really odd to me that no one else had entered the giveaway.

And you know what she said? "I didn't think it was for friends and family." Um. Okay. So I took it to FB and let the world know that it was open to anyone who bought the magazine. I mentioned it to another friend who said she had assumed the same thing. You guys are just killing me.

See this face? That is how I felt this week.

Don't get me wrong: I am so happy that so many of my friends congratulated me and bought the magazine. It is really much more appreciated that you might ever know. 

As it turns out, I learned a valuable lesson I want to share: Don't think for the Seller.

In business and love we often get tripped up by assuming we know what the other person is thinking. Even when they tell is what they are thinking, we, for someone unknown reason, believe that we are correct in our original assessment. And the one thing I can confidently promise you is this: that type of thought process has cost you way more than just one great photograph. And I would really hate for any other opportunities, in general, to pass you by.

*drumroll*

  
The giveaway winner is....both Angel and Pinky! That kind of support deserves a reward and since there are two copies, there are two winners. Thank you both for entering, it means a lot!

Blackberry: A magazine and a Giveaway!

For the past six months I have been wanting to write more. For the past three months I have been writing more. One of my goals was to submit to Blackberry: A Magazine, the lit magazine by my FB friend Alicia Sommer.

One of the reasons I have been wanting to submit is that I like what I see. More than any other magazine aimed at Black females I feel like this one gets me. Gets that I am not wanting to see a zillion ads for skin lightening cream or hair straightener. One that recognizes I am both reader and writer. One that has flesh, bone and blood.

So in January when I was able to pull together some pieces that would work with the theme I got so excited about submitting that when I was accepted there wasn't a lot of room left to get all crazy. Until Wednesday night when I got this message on FB: Hey S Luna Raven, look who made the cover. :)

Are you kidding me?!

So, I have two poems in this issue and I made the cover. I made the cover. I made the cover. Okay, I think it is safe to say that I am really, really excited!

Now the good for you part: if you buy a copy of the magazine, let me know in the comments so you can be entered to win a signed 5x7 copy of this photo. You can buy either the digital or print version of the mag, you just need to let me know in the comments that you did. That's it! It's so worth it, not only to support me (which I thank you for) but all the other ladies and the fabulous Alicia, who works so hard to make this so great!

The giveaway ends March 8th at Midnight. Don't be shy, tell all your friends!

<3

Luna

My Word of 2013: More

 "A seed, dropped into the ground, springs into activity, and in the act of living produces a hundred seeds; life, by living, multiplies itself." Wallace D. Wattles

a journal page from two years ago

I have had a hard time choosing my word for the year. There were a few that stuck out for me: feminine, shifting, release. The word that stuck though is from a book I have been reading, The Science of Getting Rich. I realize that more is really what I want even though I haven't really been able to put that into the context I was trying to convey. Luckily, Wattles did it quite nicely for me.

"It is the natural and inherent impulse to seek to live more; it is the nature of intelligence to enlarge itself, and of consciousness to seek to extend the boundaries and find fuller expression." 

More to me means:

 

More love: Not just what I take in, what I allow in. What I send out. Including to myself. And I reserve the right to say I don't love someone or want them in my life. Because true self love means not allowing people, things or situations into your life that hold you down or harm you,

More sacred yes. And no: I made a firm decision in November that I needed to be more thoughtful of my yes and no's. I am proud to say that I have done well with honoring my own values which means I am creating a healthy space for others to do the same, for me and for themselves.

More health: the smoothie kick we jumped on a few months ago is still going. We have been taking it seriously, a feat that is made easier by doing it together. Also, more walking, more movement, more nutrient dense food. So boring, I know!

More! More good decisions, more rest, more art, more organization, more time with friends, more travel. Expansion, expression, fullness, open dreaming, letting the sky not be the limit because there is a world beyond it!

What is your word for 2013? What represents where you want to go or who you want to be more of in this shiny new year? What are you releasing so you can grab what you want? Share with me in the comments!

The Benefits of Asking For Help

Resources. We have a tendency to think of resources as things rather than people, forgetting that we have friends and acquaintances who may know things we need to.


We are surrounded by those who not only have answers but actually wish to help. Instead we waste time and energy searching for an answer, when help was sitting right next to us, for fear that we might look stupid, or weak or like a burden.

By never putting ourselves forward, vital connections are missed that could move us in exactly the direction we want and need to go. We have to get over this desire to not burden others, especially when they long to help, to share, to encourage and to celebrate our very being.


I am delighted when I am able to be a resource for others, because I have knowledge they need and the ability to give it freely. Because to share information only helps me in the long run.It helps all of us! We give a gift when we ask for or extend help. It is part of the natural cycle of give & receive that helps keep us all in balance with ourselves and the 'Verse.


Don't be afraid to step outside of yourself, should you need help, energy, support or even just a hug! A resource is a valuable tool, a gift, and not everyone has them. There's gold in them there minds!

Raspberry Cupcakes

Baking is one of those things I feel I need to do when I feel really mislaigned. The process of creating something from scratch always feels so magical and important to me that I love the whole process. Before you think of how scary it is to bake with the weights and measures, it's really a thing you should relax about. The oven can always tell when you panic! We can still get raspberries here in California but I did originally make these June as I do try to utilize what is fresh and in season. But with Fall not yet raising her pretty head it is really hard to know what season it is right now!

Raspberry Cupcakes

1/2 cup soft unsalted butter
2/3 cup brown sugar
1 cup flour + 1/2 cup oat flour
1 1/2 teaspoons baking powder
1/2 teaspoon salt
1 c half and half
2 eggs
1/4 cup fresh raspberries
12 dark chocolate discs

 preheat oven to 350 F. Line muffin tin.


 Whisk together the dry ingredients and set aside. Beat the butter, sugar, milk and eggs on low until pale and fluffy. Add your dry ingrediants and combine until just mixed. Divide evenly among the muffin cups, place a chocolate disk in sideways and bake for about 15 minutes, or until a skewer comes out clean.

I like to do a basic vanilla frosting with this, butter, powdered sugar plus a splash of milk and vanilla. Enjoy!

Bacon, Leek and Potato Tart

I don't know about your house, but I live with a meat and potatoes kind of man, so sometimes I have to get inventive if I want him to eat outside of the proverbial box. This idea came when I realized that putting something tasty with bacon in pastry was a sure fire way to get him to enjoy something I really wanted. He still has no idea what all the ingredients are. It's best if we just don't tell him.

For the Tart you will need:

1 uncooked pie crust:

1 1/4 cup flour

3/4 stick cold butter, cubed

1/4 tsp salt

5 tbsp cold water

Combine salt and flour. You can use a food processor or mixer for this. Add butter and mix until it looks like a mealy dough. Add water 1 tbsp at a time until it makes a cohesive dough. Have extra cold water ready just in case your dough is a bit dry.

Pat into a round, wrap and chill for at least one hour.

preheat your oven to 350 F. and prep the rest of your ingredients.

For the filling you will need:

6 slices bacon, cooked crisp

4 potatoes, sliced thin and par cooked

1 large leek, cleaned sliced thin and lightly sauteed

The easiest thing to do is utilize your bacon fat here and cook the potatoes and leeks in it as well!

Use paper towels or tempura paper to drain the fat and set aside.

Once you have everything together, roll out your dough and place it in a tart tin. You don't want it too thick, or it won't be very crispy. Prick the bottom of the dough, pop into the oven for 7 to 10 minutes or until turning a light golden brown. Add your potatoes, leeks and bacon to the tart crust and then pour over 3 tsp cream + 1 egg (2 if you really like eggs), lightly beaten with a fork.

Bake about 20, then turn off your oven and allow to cool.

This is perfect for a light supper with some arugula and mushrooms, or even with a lovely little french onion soup!

Molasses Cookies

Imagine a day where you need something warm and delicious to go with brown sugar ice cream. So you whip up a simple, delicious batch of cookies, the kind that once rolled in a little brown sugar have a marvelous crispy texture and are perfect for a sandwich cookie.Yeah, I thought that might get your attention.

Molasses Cookies

1/2 c shortening
1 c brown sugar + 1/2 c set aside
1/2 c molasses
1 egg
2 c whole wheat pastry flour
1 tsp ground ginger
1 tsp ground cardamom
1/2 tsp cloves (optional)
1/2 tsp salt

preheat oven to 350 F.

Whisk together dry ingredients and set aside.

Beat sugar, egg, molasses and shortening until light and fluffy.

Beat in dry ingredients until well combined.

Use a tea spoon or a small cookie scoop and drop into the brown sugar that was set aside. Roll, press down and bake for about 10 min.

These are also easy to freeze! Don't roll in sugar until you are ready to bake. Freeze on a piece of parchment in a flat area of your freezer, then wrap in plastic wrap or freezer safe bags.

Reciprocity

The call in the world right now is do good, help others and everything else will fall in line. There are certainly some though, who might attest that it is not always quite so simple. I say things may be lining up, though very different from how you envisioned. This might be the perfect time to step back and assess.

So, what good have you gained from the good you have put out into the world? Has it taken a form that made it almost unrecognizable as reciprocity? I have found that much of what I do for others is paid back in kind from completely different quarters. Today might be a good day to really sit down and count your blessings.

You will be surprised at the bounty of goodness you have received when you weren't even looking.

What abundance have you reaped that might have come from good you did for someone else? Share it in the comments, because celebrating abundance always brings more!

Apricot Lavender Shortbread

I know that there are a great many people who don't care for lavender in their food and insist that it takes like soap. I have two things to say to that: 'Okay, then you don't have to eat it' and 'If it tastes like soap, you've done something terribly wrong.'

When I worked at the winery years ago I got used to wandering out in the garden and taking roses, borage, lavender, lemon verbena and rosemary back into my kitchen. The amount of dreamy things you can create from fresh herbs is beyond measure and I for one am looking forward to the day when we are back in a spot where Sascha can have a garden.

This recipe is from my pastry chef days, and I promise you, it is really good. The trick is, as always, to use high quality ingredients and have patience. Baked goods cannot be rushed and they will know if you get desperate.  For me, the golden rule is to relax into what you are doing, whether that be baking or cooking. Believe me, it makes all the difference in the world.

Apricot Lavender Shortbread

1 c walnut oil

2 c pastry flour

½ c lavender sugar (use 1 tsp of lavender for your 1/2 c of sugar)

½ tsp salt

1½ c dried apricots, chopped and re-hydrated

preheat oven to 325 F.

Combine all ingredients until well mixed, pat into in lightly oiled pan and bake for 20 minutes. Allow to cool, cut and enjoy!

Lemon and Ricotta Ziti

 When I made this, I honestly felt that it really needed more lemon, but I am a lemon freak. Taste the ricotta and lemon before adding it to the pasta, that way you can adjust as you need to it. What I love about this dish it that it is quick and that you could easily add a little more or vegetables for something that is nutritious and palate pleasing.

For four servings, you will need:

Coarse salt
1 lb ziti
1 lb ricotta
3 tbsp butter
Freshly grated pepper
Zest and juice of 2 lemons
Fresh chopped herbs (I like thyme or rosemary, but its up to you)

Boil water and salt it. Cook pasta until al dente.

Stir lemon zest, juice and herbs into ricotta. Save 1 cup of pasta water before draining.

 Return pasta to pot, stir in butter and then add ricotta. Season to taste with pepper. If you need to thin the cheese out, add some of your pasta water.

Add a salad and you have dinner in no time!

Independently Happy

Last year, I had someone tell me that it seemed like I craved the drama of my old life because I miss certain people. At the time, I thought that she could possibly be right.

Upon further reflection though, it is quite easy for someone who has had an easy life to make that sort of assumption.

Much has happened in my life and since I am only a third of the way through it, it seems daunting to people that I have seen so much pain and come out on the other side still happy.

I'm here to tell you this: Unhappiness is severely overrated.

Moving into a space where I don't dwell on my mistakes has allowed me to see my true worth. Sure I have bad days, everybody does.  

But we never have to be whatever someone else tells us we are.

I am vulnerable. I am ready to live my best. And just because I miss people from my past doesn't mean I crave drama. It just means I can look back with clear eyes.

Bartending School Week 1

Right off the bat I gotta tell you that one of the reasons I like the SFSOB is that if you come to the Monday intro class, you actually get behind the bar. And I like that the first day after lecture we did just that. We were behind the bar making & learning drinks.

Some I knew, like the Screwdriver, the Cape Cod, the Fuzzy Navel. And some drinks were sorely testing me Wednesday and Thursday. Frou Frou drinks like the Purple Hooter and the Appletini are just foreign to my whiskey loving palate.

I know that there is quite a bit of disgust these days regarding bartending school among old guard bartenders out there, but I have to say, as well as I can spot which liquor is which and knowing what mixes with what, this is both a similar and dissimilar activity as working as a chef.

The movements, for example the lift & pop, take practice to get them smooth. Finding the rhythmic fluidity is important and yesterday I started to get it. I would rather do that in the classroom than on the job so that it becomes a natural habit without me looking like a total idjit in front of customers!

Since I already know that I am adept at retaining recipes, one trick I used was to find similar drinks and group them together. Make a Greyhound from grapefruit and vodka. Salt the rim for a Salty Dog, For a Sea Breeze, add cranberry. This has actually been a helpful tool in getting the drinks down. (pun possibly intended)

Some people are a little sad that we are using water to practice with. As our first instructor pointed out, beyond legalities, with the amount of practice we do he'd be having a heart attack every time we poured out a drink! It is also probably good for those who may think that it is all about drinking behind the bar....

I am also reading this book by William Grimes and think I need to get a copy of it.This is the sort of information I love, history and classic cocktails. Total win, right?! Well, I have to go because I have class and a midterm today, woo! But stay tuned, tomorrow we will be at the East Bay Wine Trail pouring for Stomping Girl and then tasting later in the day, so there will be an update Sunday!

Glittery hugs!

My First Etsy Sale and Daylight savings

I made my first sale on Etsy! I am pretty excited that the buyer bought what is truly one of my favorite pieces. You know how much I love things that sparkle & shine! And it feels good to have made my first sale!

 Last week was rough because everyone has been sick. Weirdly being sick made more focused so I did four paintings and started a crochet bag as well as working on my crocheted baby sweater. I sadly had to scrap one of the paintings due to the paper but that is still the survival of three I am really happy with!

I am also convinced that I am the only person I know who is excited about daylight savings time. For me it is a time of more light which equals more freedom. When I was younger I had to drive mom around in the winter due to her night blindness. It meant that my winter was never my own and the early dark still makes me a little sad. I never feel like I have lost an hour so much as I have gained more time over all.

My neighborhood at sunset

What successes are you celebrating this week?