Messages from the Canvas

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Isolation is a Dreamkiller. Barbara Sher

                                                                                                                                                   

The Motherload

 I have purple paint under my fingernail. In my mind, I'm still dancing with glitter paint and painting flowers. Paint, paint, paint. I sit at home doing my artwork and wondering, who will like this, who will connect to this, who will care? I suspect that it is the same for many artists.

The choice to go check out an intuitive art class wasn't a conscious one. That was a soul choice, rising up from within, clamoring for something deeper. I was nervous. So used to feeling out of sync with the dynamic in a room. Awkward. The warmth of my welcome was not lost on me. Hmmmm...... I was hugged, I was greeted kindly, I was listened to.

This isn't an art class on a typical level. You aren't there to learn how to draw or paint better. The purpose is get into the work and listen to your inner guide. It is so easy to forget that there is so much wisdom within us. Our inner guides, our intuition has so much to say.

Painting in a quiet room filled with other people is liberating. Knowing that there is someone there to help if you need creates a sense of peace that is needed when getting deep into the process. Which I did. These shifting waves that began in March are still tumbling over me. Still opening me.

And then came a message from the canvas. While I am ready to create more space, this is not a practice I have much experience in. Clearly my subconscious is letting me know that it is time to create something new. It is both exciting and terrifying.

My takeaway from Chris Zydel's Intuitive Art class? That out of syncness doesn't have to exist. This is not a competition. The only person I need to get really vulnerable with in that room is myself. And that is possibly the greatest challenge of all.

Housing the Sole

one of my contributions from 30 days of creativity June 2011

I think a lot about my feet. We stand on them and they hold us up for hours at a time. They allow us to walk, sometimes miles, before we allow them to rest. We don't take care of them the way we should, though, honoring the gift that they bestow upon us. I personally am grateful everyday for having feet that take me where I want to go on my nicely working stems.

My sister takes poor care of her feet. I discovered last year that apparently when our dad was handing out advice on taking care of the feet, he only was talking to me, the daughter with the sudden random growth spurt and long feet. I walk everywhere, so keep my nails trimmed, try to always wear good shoes and if I need to, soak them in salt & bubble bath.

Being kind to the limbs at the end of your legs is important. When I see a person who is no longer easily mobile, I think about how much I would miss that and then I go for a long walk in the sunshine because I can and what a blessing that is! Do what the picture says, and all will be just fine.

Want to treat your feet?

Plan to do nothing for 10 to 20 minutes. Put down a towel. Get something you can easily put both of your feet in and add some warm water. I like it slightly hot so it doesn't cool down too fast. Toss in a handful of Epsom salt. When I run out, I use sea salt, which still has some nice texture to it. Add some of your favorite scent bubble bath or soap and as an extra, add a bit of oil (I like coconut) to help soften. Grab a second towel and a book, sit down, soak your feet. Relax! Enjoy this peaceful moment.

Where do You Want to Go?

I know where I'm going.

I even see how it's beginning to happen as it takes shape. But I'm not ready to get there yet.

'Serenity' photo (C) Seletta M Raven

Well, that isn't really true. I am more ready than ever before. I am actively working towards it. Some days it feels as though no progress has been made in any direction, though that is far from true. Where I want and need to go doesn't look to me anything like it does to anyone else. I am finally comfortable with letting the flow happen. Because fighting the current only causes more trouble!

My ultimate goal is to have my needs met and my wants exceeded.

Where are you wanting to go that you are not quite ready for? Is it different from the expectations of those around you? Where do you want to go and how can your community help you get there?

Bacon, Leek and Potato Tart

I don't know about your house, but I live with a meat and potatoes kind of man, so sometimes I have to get inventive if I want him to eat outside of the proverbial box. This idea came when I realized that putting something tasty with bacon in pastry was a sure fire way to get him to enjoy something I really wanted. He still has no idea what all the ingredients are. It's best if we just don't tell him.

For the Tart you will need:

1 uncooked pie crust:

1 1/4 cup flour

3/4 stick cold butter, cubed

1/4 tsp salt

5 tbsp cold water

Combine salt and flour. You can use a food processor or mixer for this. Add butter and mix until it looks like a mealy dough. Add water 1 tbsp at a time until it makes a cohesive dough. Have extra cold water ready just in case your dough is a bit dry.

Pat into a round, wrap and chill for at least one hour.

preheat your oven to 350 F. and prep the rest of your ingredients.

For the filling you will need:

6 slices bacon, cooked crisp

4 potatoes, sliced thin and par cooked

1 large leek, cleaned sliced thin and lightly sauteed

The easiest thing to do is utilize your bacon fat here and cook the potatoes and leeks in it as well!

Use paper towels or tempura paper to drain the fat and set aside.

Once you have everything together, roll out your dough and place it in a tart tin. You don't want it too thick, or it won't be very crispy. Prick the bottom of the dough, pop into the oven for 7 to 10 minutes or until turning a light golden brown. Add your potatoes, leeks and bacon to the tart crust and then pour over 3 tsp cream + 1 egg (2 if you really like eggs), lightly beaten with a fork.

Bake about 20, then turn off your oven and allow to cool.

This is perfect for a light supper with some arugula and mushrooms, or even with a lovely little french onion soup!

Molasses Cookies

Imagine a day where you need something warm and delicious to go with brown sugar ice cream. So you whip up a simple, delicious batch of cookies, the kind that once rolled in a little brown sugar have a marvelous crispy texture and are perfect for a sandwich cookie.Yeah, I thought that might get your attention.

Molasses Cookies

1/2 c shortening
1 c brown sugar + 1/2 c set aside
1/2 c molasses
1 egg
2 c whole wheat pastry flour
1 tsp ground ginger
1 tsp ground cardamom
1/2 tsp cloves (optional)
1/2 tsp salt

preheat oven to 350 F.

Whisk together dry ingredients and set aside.

Beat sugar, egg, molasses and shortening until light and fluffy.

Beat in dry ingredients until well combined.

Use a tea spoon or a small cookie scoop and drop into the brown sugar that was set aside. Roll, press down and bake for about 10 min.

These are also easy to freeze! Don't roll in sugar until you are ready to bake. Freeze on a piece of parchment in a flat area of your freezer, then wrap in plastic wrap or freezer safe bags.

Apricot Lavender Shortbread

I know that there are a great many people who don't care for lavender in their food and insist that it takes like soap. I have two things to say to that: 'Okay, then you don't have to eat it' and 'If it tastes like soap, you've done something terribly wrong.'

When I worked at the winery years ago I got used to wandering out in the garden and taking roses, borage, lavender, lemon verbena and rosemary back into my kitchen. The amount of dreamy things you can create from fresh herbs is beyond measure and I for one am looking forward to the day when we are back in a spot where Sascha can have a garden.

This recipe is from my pastry chef days, and I promise you, it is really good. The trick is, as always, to use high quality ingredients and have patience. Baked goods cannot be rushed and they will know if you get desperate.  For me, the golden rule is to relax into what you are doing, whether that be baking or cooking. Believe me, it makes all the difference in the world.

Apricot Lavender Shortbread

1 c walnut oil

2 c pastry flour

½ c lavender sugar (use 1 tsp of lavender for your 1/2 c of sugar)

½ tsp salt

1½ c dried apricots, chopped and re-hydrated

preheat oven to 325 F.

Combine all ingredients until well mixed, pat into in lightly oiled pan and bake for 20 minutes. Allow to cool, cut and enjoy!

Lemon and Ricotta Ziti

 When I made this, I honestly felt that it really needed more lemon, but I am a lemon freak. Taste the ricotta and lemon before adding it to the pasta, that way you can adjust as you need to it. What I love about this dish it that it is quick and that you could easily add a little more or vegetables for something that is nutritious and palate pleasing.

For four servings, you will need:

Coarse salt
1 lb ziti
1 lb ricotta
3 tbsp butter
Freshly grated pepper
Zest and juice of 2 lemons
Fresh chopped herbs (I like thyme or rosemary, but its up to you)

Boil water and salt it. Cook pasta until al dente.

Stir lemon zest, juice and herbs into ricotta. Save 1 cup of pasta water before draining.

 Return pasta to pot, stir in butter and then add ricotta. Season to taste with pepper. If you need to thin the cheese out, add some of your pasta water.

Add a salad and you have dinner in no time!

Independently Happy

Last year, I had someone tell me that it seemed like I craved the drama of my old life because I miss certain people. At the time, I thought that she could possibly be right.

Upon further reflection though, it is quite easy for someone who has had an easy life to make that sort of assumption.

Much has happened in my life and since I am only a third of the way through it, it seems daunting to people that I have seen so much pain and come out on the other side still happy.

I'm here to tell you this: Unhappiness is severely overrated.

Moving into a space where I don't dwell on my mistakes has allowed me to see my true worth. Sure I have bad days, everybody does.  

But we never have to be whatever someone else tells us we are.

I am vulnerable. I am ready to live my best. And just because I miss people from my past doesn't mean I crave drama. It just means I can look back with clear eyes.

Unicorn hair, ramen and weekends

This past week was so busy! I learned Excel, did pilates twice and attended a yarn conference.
As far as pilates goes, I have lost 3 inches off my hips and not sure how much off my waist. It's quite visible to me though and the best part is I go once a week for an hour. Thus far that is 7 weeks very well spent!

Friday I started a new painting which I am quite happy with. I restarted the Willowing art and healing class, which was just what I needed to try and get some of the shading down that has been alluding me. I wanted to do something fun, so this is what I sketched out...

I had the chance to hit up Stitches West for the first time, which was made all the better by friends! Heather was kind enough to drive and then I got to hang out with her Elaine, Maia and Nathan, plus I fell in love with Purlesence Yarns, who helped me fall in love with Xcentricities Corsets, then I discovered Little Red Bicycle and fell further in love with Craftsy.

Some of this will be used for magic in the shop, woo!

I think my only really gripe is that I would have liked to see more crochet and what I did find was sort of hidden off in corners. No one was rude when I said I crocheted, but most of the products seemed very much geared towards knitters.

For dinner we went to Ramen Club where watching the ramen get made was part of the thrill of eating it. I have to say, Ramen Club is most certainly worth going out of your way for!! I rounded off my weekend with book club lead by Christina in which we discussed Four Kitchens. Four Kitchens makes me wish I had had the ability to stage as she did. It's been a good read so far and her talk of Noodle Town made me so hungry!

This week is more networking and the finally the SF Chocolate Salon an event I always look forward to. Hope you have had a busy week too, don't forget to share what you've been doing!

Life in the Details

Lately when I have been reading the Scoutie Girl blog I feel as though each post is speaking directly to me. Like this one Well Fed Artists and this one today Are you leaving enough space for your life in your work?

I am looking at my calender for the next few weeks and things are starting to pick up again. And truthfully, the past two weeks, my balance has been off. Way off. Since I love being busy, I need to be much more aware and keep myself check: no matter how much I have to do I need to make sure I am eating right and stopping when my body says stop.

Scarf action with ArtFibers fabulous Kanji, tussah silk and bamboo

Luckily every week before my coaching call, I have to journal about what I have done in the last week. This has been one of the most powerful tools anyone has ever shared with me. In my mind I am a slacker. In my journal it would appear that I do so much I can't even remember half of it! If you haven't tried this you might find it a really helpful trick.

I have been busy crocheting, too, but not too busy to get in some art....

Are you listening to yourself to make sure that your life is in line with your busy? What tricks do you use to make things easier?

Coffee Shortbread

Coffee Shortbread

8 oz butter, cold & cut in pieces

4 oz brown sugar

½ tsp sea salt

8 oz Whole Wheat pastry flour

2 tsp coffee (I used a dark roast from Peets, finely ground)

1 tsp vanilla

4 oz potato starch

Preheat oven to 350 F. Place all your ingredients in a bowl, then rub the butter in, as for pie crust. Once it starts to make a dough, shape into a large round for triangles or a rectangle if you want to cut squares. My oven tends to run hot, so I bake them for 20-30 minutes, so just know how your oven is.

Cut into wedges or squares while warm. Enjoy!